Rolling over, eating cereal and fruit and everything else

Guess who's back?  Hello everyone!  I hope that you are all still out there and that everything has been going good for you.  Evan is now 4 months old!  Time has been flying by, it seems like yesterday I was sitting in the hopsital typing the story of the labor and delivery and being so amazingly nervous about how things were going to be.  Fast forward through countless poopie diapers, un-godly amounts of spit up stains and even more smiles and we are at today.  Evan's personality is developing the way I expected it to.  He gets pissed off and yells when he tries to do something he can't (like get a toy into his mouth right) and will laugh at anything remotely funny or amusing.  He loves LOVES loves Sesame Street, especially Cookie Monster, and has recently found the horror that is Yo Gabba Gabba.  He is over 13 pounds, eats cereal and fruit - Which by the way, does anyone know if Gerber makes anything other than apples, pears and bananas?  Anyway, our lives are full of bottles, diapers, bills and moments we never thought we would be sharing together. 
Our new house is great and the other three kids have adjusted seemlessly to having a baby in the house.  The girls help when needed (except for diaper changes that is) and Jay wants to be involved in everything. 

Life is good here in the Rush household.  I really shouldn't complain as much as I do about things.  Money is tighter but that was to be expected.  Alone time with my wife is limited, but that's not a shocker either.  But I keep reminding myself that all of the little things that have changed are definitely worth going through, especially when I get to look at my son everyday.

It's been quite awhile, but with good reason I swear!

Hello everyone!  Sorry it's been so long since my last update but like normal, things are banana's here in the Rush household.  Over the last few weeks there have been quite a few family issues that we have been tending to as well as some episodes with Evan that those of you who follow our facebook page have been aware of. 
A week ago today we had our first big scare with Evan, he vomitted his entire bottle, his mouth and nose were full of formula.  He was left gasping for air and screaming in fear which as a parent is the worst feeling in the world.  We were shaken up but assumed it was just from a gas bubble or upset belly or something along those lines.  Tuesday morning came and the same thing happened which got us looking into pyloric stenosis due to some family history on her side.  We called our Dr. and went in for a check up and he said it did not appear as though that was the case seeing as how he was gaining weight (10lbs 8oz) and it had only happened twice but we were to keep an eye on him and if it happened again to take him to the ER and get an ultrasound done.
Which brings me to yesterday.  I was at work when I got a voice mail from my frantic wife saying it happened again and she was taking him to the ER. I rushed home, got in the car and drove up to the hospital where he was born.  It is a strange feeling making the same drive we took when she was still pregnant.  I have not been in that area since he was born so it was a bit surreal to make the drive again.  Anyway, we were in the ER for the afternoon with our little man for an ultrasound and check up to ensure his tummy was working the way it is supposed to, which it is.  We were essentially told to cut back a little on the amount of formula and keep him sitting up for about 20 to 30 minutes after each feeding before allowing him to lay down.
I had forgotten what parenting a newborn was like, what it was all about.  It is hard, it is exhausting, it is draining, it is expensive and it is 100% worth it when you are dead tired and you look down and your baby is smiling with a face full of formula.  Things have been tough lately.  My wife and I are navigating the waters of a relationship that has changed, my sister has been dealing with some problems at home and sometimes I feel like my parents turn to me the way I turned to them when I was younger, but as my parents only son and being only 3 years younger than my sister this tends to happen I suppose.  Along with the burdens of supporting my 6 person household and getting ready for a move that is happening in the next 2 weeks I have taken on the added stress and pressure of ensuring the rest of my family is doing ok as well.  This is something that takes some time to get used to with the addition of a new baby.  My days go from Evan's first feeding around 5:30 or 6:00am (which I do because I am up for work anyway) until 11 or sometimes 12 at night depending. 
For those who are parents you know where I am coming from and for those who are expecting take my advice on this one thing if nothing else, SLEEP NOW!  Trust me, even if your baby sleeps through the night like Evan does (usually 10 - 5:30 or 6) you won't. 

Please don't forget to order my book from Amazon.com - http://www.amazon.com/What-Didnt-Expect-While-Expecting/dp/1453698175/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1281712135&sr=1-1

You know when I was a kid...

It has been a month since we rushed to the hospital. Four weeks have gone by since we rushed into the emergency room and began the final stage of the pregnancy. That’s right everyone, Evan is 1 month old already and the time has been rushing by. Evan has been a great baby so far, he sleeps almost every night for anywhere between 5 and 7 hours straight and is a pretty happy baby when he is awake. The only time we really hear him get a little cranky is when he has been sleeping for awhile and wakes up hungry. One of the nicknames we have given him is baby bird. When he is starving his mouth flies open and his head wiggles around the second anything touches his chin or anywhere near his mouth. He goes after his clothes, burp cloths, blankets, our noses, anything. Mommy and I have adjusted to the change in schedule and have been in a routine that is working great for us. The visitors have slowed down but that is fine with us because we are pretty greedy when it comes to him anyway  .


Shawna has not been hovering nearly as much as she was the first two weeks which is a great relief for me. In fact, this past weekend she went to a wedding that was about 1.5 hours away. This gave me the entire afternoon to be alone with Tami and Evan. I felt a lot like Tom Hanks in “Cast Away” when he created fire. It was hard for me to control my emotions sitting on the couch with the two human beings that were in this world because of me. I have created two lives and am partially responsible for ensuring they become successful members of society. There really is no way in the world you can describe the feelings you have for your children, it’s just something only a parent can understand.

On a completely unrelated note I was talking with my parents the other day and they had mentioned some of things they used to do when my sister and I were little to get out of the house but not spend a ton of money. One of the things they talked about was how they used to take us to a Chinese food place and get an order of pork fried rice, two egg rolls (cut in half) and a drink for us to share. Until that conversation I never realized that we shared a meal or anything. I only remember going there and having fun, sitting on a booster seat and eating off a red tray. Now kids expect so much and it’s because we continue to give them way more than we ever had. The things kids will remember most are the things I remembered. Spending time as a family and joking around with each other far outweighs the actual event. My Dad worked long hours Tuesday through Saturday so he wasn’t home that often but what I remember about those days were the trips to the community pool, day trips to the Pocconos (which he always called the Poke-a-nose) and just spending time doing things that didn’t involved a cell phone, a TV or a computer.

I am guilty of this myself. My kids don’t know what it’s like to get your clothes from a grocery store like I did when Laneco was big. They don’t share food and they sure as hell can’t breathe without some type of electronic device near them. Every generation looks at the one behind it and says the same thing, “you know when I was a kid …” No kid wants to hear that anymore than any parent wants to hear about Little Johnny and how his parents bought him this and they went there on vacation when they can’t afford to keep up with them.

Hovering

Last night there were two events that took place that I wanted to discuss. The first of which needs a brief back story. I play in a men’s softball league and on this past Monday I was running from 2nd to 3rd when I felt a slight pop in Achilles heel and have been limping since. Ok, so at about 4:30am Evan lets out this scream and cry that made me jump from the bed and run over to his crib. By the time I got there and put my hand on his chest to try and soothe him he already fallen back to sleep. As any parent knows, these types of things send a jolt of adrenaline through your veins that can only be matched by the first drop of a really friggin tall roller coaster.


After realizing he was ok the adrenaline started wearing off and the realization that I had just literally jumped off my bed and ran across the room on my weak foot and the pain shot straight up to my head and I fell to the ground. Again, to touch on yesterday’s post, these are the types of things that drive me nuts as a parent of older kids. It brings to life all of the things that you put your kids needs and wants in front of yours. While I was waiting for the ability to get back up and hobble over to the bed I started thinking that one day Evan will look at me when I tell him no and say something close to, “It’s not fair!” Ahh the innocence of teens assuming that life should be fair.

The other event that got me thinking happened after his feeding was done. Generally I do the feeding before I go to work but since he slept from 9:30pm to 4:30am I knew he wouldn’t be ready to eat again before I left at 6:45 so I wanted to hold him for a few minutes while he was up. I was laying in bed and laid him down next to me as I have done a few times, not for him to sleep there but just so we can be on the same level. While looking into his eyes I heard the following from the other side of the bed, “Be careful with him, I just read an article about SIDS and it said sleeping in the bed is a major cause.” This is something that you hovering mothers need to think long and hard about approaching. My wife especially because with my first baby I was 14 and got an awful lot of suggestions and explanations from everyone on how to do certain things and what not to do because I was kid. This time however I am a 28 year old man and I know what I am doing. In fact, unless you see the father of your baby doing something completely idiotic or he specifically says, “I have no idea what the hell I am doing, can you help me out?” Try not to interject too much because he will eventually feel like he can’t do anything with the baby around you because you don’t trust him.

Diapers, bottles and laundry oh my!

Anyone who is a parent to an infant knows where I am going with the subject of this post.  For those of you who are expecting your first baby or just reading this to see what it is going to be like, dirty diapers, bottle cleaning and loads of laundry will be almost as common when your baby is born as breathing and blinking are.  Currently our lives consist of changing diapers full of pee and poop, washing the clothes he has peed and spit up on and washing the bottles / pumping equipment that get dirtied every 4 to 5 hours.  These chores become incredibly mind numbing after awhile and begin to feel like they are done every 15 minutes, and in some cases are.  The worst is when you know he is taking a poop, you feel as though he has completed his task and take him off to change his diaper.  The big stinky mess has been cleaned, the onesie buttoned and then what is that noise that you hear?  That's right, your little bundle of joy is pushing out more poopy just for you!
My son is amazing, he is handsome and happy and to this point he sleeps great at night.  I miss him like crazy when I am at work and just his smile or things he has done have brought me to tears a few times but raising a baby is trying.  The change in schedule is hard, you lose who you were and your idea of a great date night or weekend changes.  It is definitely something that you can't half ass and claim to be good at.  You either step up to the plate 100% or don't step onto the field. 
While I am typing this post Evan is sitting in his swing and yawning and I can't help but wonder how all of these men who donate their sperm and take off and then show up once every 3 or 4 months feel as though they can take any credit for raising their kids?  What gives them the right to be celebrated on Father's Day?  Phone calls, letters and 2 weeks a year don't give you a true understanding of what it means to be a parent.  I read in a book that it takes 10,000 hours of practice at something before you become an expert at it, at that rate some of these men will never be a parenting expert.

Evan week 3

It's hard to believe that I just typed "Evan week 3" in the title line of this blog but time has really been flying by that fast.  We are just a few days away from his 3 week birthday and he is growing so much.  He had another Dr. visit today and is tipping the scales at 9lbs and measuring a whopping 20.5 inches.  I have found great solice in the fact that everyday when I come home he is there and needs me.  My first born is going to 14 soon and lives with her mother and does not need me the way she used to.  My step-daughter who is also 14 is in the same boat, she needs a ride to a friends house, she needs money for a pool dance but where these things come from are not a concern.  My 7 year old step son gets his food together when he is hungry, changes his own clothes and has the imagination of a muppet baby so even he is starting to be on his own more.  Evan on the other hand can't hold his head up on his own for longer than 30 seconds, he needs me.  It's good to feel needed as a parent for more than money and transportation.  I enjoy have the responsibility of ensuring this life that I have helped to create is taken care of.  During the pregnancy I was worried that I would be unable to do the things I needed to, like change a diaper fast enough or be alone and have to warm a bottle, change a diaper and keep him from fraeking out but it's all second nature.  The other night I woke up with him to feed him and I changed his diaper in the dark, didn't get peed on and put the diaper on the right way.
I generally do the feeding closer to the start of my morning to give myself a chance to spend time with him and to allow Shawna the opportunity to sleep uninterrupted and our team efforts have seemingly been beneficial for all of us.  The first few nights we both got up and were doing things but we soon realized that this was not as necessary as it is for one of us to be catching up on our sleep.  It is important for both parents to realize that this is a team effort and it is best to figure out and discuss what is the best way to handle everything, especially if the mother is breast feeding or pumping.  Everyone is better at certain things like diaper changing or feeding or bathing and you shouldn't be afraid to tell your partner how you feel about it.